Field notes from the thrill-seeking father

Field notes from the thrill-seeking father

Thrill Dad
Illustration by Mark Matcho

1. Repeat after me, youthful man: There’s no shame in transporting a baby bag.

2. You’ve still got a beating heart along with a 266-horsepower engine. You may still get out there and paint the city. But you’re a guy now, with grown-up responsibilities that James Dean never imagined, as well as your Porsche 550 Spyder has turned into a Toyota Sienna, as well as your cigarettes have transmogrified into Fish, as well as your new adventures may have one slight complication:

3. You’re likely to bring the children.

4. The Harmful Playground stands on the plateau close to the eastern terminus of 13th Street in Midtown. You may refer to it as the Noguchi Playscape, which may be accurate, or That Place Where They Accustomed to Sell Drugs, which may be also accurate, because of the good reputation for its hidden staircase. The staircase winds upward nearly 20 ft in the tall white-colored cylinder and results in a lengthy and fast and beautiful aluminum slide that curves lower the tower’s outer wall. Don’t enable your children go lower this slide without you. Someone needs to make certain they’re safe.

5. The Flying Trick is definitely an outside trick involving a little child along with a father in which the father accumulates the little child and hurls the kid in to the air so the child is briefly flying, and so the father catches the kid-much towards the relief of everybody who’s waiting and seeking to not look horrified. All I’m able to say relating to this trick is the fact that children enjoy it and request it by name, and kids must always get what they need.

6. Stay gone as lengthy as you desire. What’s your spouse likely to say? Please bring the children home I miss them? A home is too quiet? A home is too clean?

7. The Harmful Playground also offers a mound of concrete that’s helpful for enjoying king from the hill and perhaps knocking your teeth. Also, large cubes of concrete that cause vertiginous open space. And the other group of lightning-fast slides that may simply be arrived at by climbing hazardous metal ladders. This playground is among two at Piedmont Park. Bring your children to both, then ask which that they like better: the standard Playground or even the Harmful Playground? They’ll answer properly.

8. The Spinning Trick is yet another outside trick involving a young child along with a father far more of centrifugal pressure. Afterward, you’re both dizzy, which means you lie lower within the grass and appear up in the sky and think about the self-apparent facts of existence, exactly like it: Children have to play outdoors, even at 34.

9. It might be just a little weird for men to appear alone in the DeKalb Peachtree Airport terminal and wallow in it for hrs watching the planes remove and land and take and land using their screaming jet engines as well as their vapor trails as well as their general breathtaking masterdom. If, however, the person had children, and that he had to have his children towards the playground near the airfield, he wouldn’t be weird whatsoever. He’d you need to be a great father.

10. The Frightening Trick is comparable to the Spinning Trick but a little more harmful. It’s done only upon request, preferably when nobody else is searching.

11. When it’s winter outdoors, a theoretical man might drive to some theoretical downtown to some certain large theoretical hotel having a cavernous atrium which has numerous elevators and escalators and staircases and acres of carpet that youngsters as well as their father could increase and lower and around on when they been there. Atlanta magazine doesn’t condone such activity, for which it’s worth, which isn’t much since the whole scenario is imaginary.

12. Within this same theoretical downtown, there’s a subway station deep on your lawn by having an escalator that’s been precisely referred to as the large Big Giant Escalator. This escalator is situated outdoors the turnstiles, meaning you could ride it limitless occasions without ever having to pay the fare. If a person were like doing so.

13. Diaper change around the grass in Centennial Olympic Park, and you need to do it truly fast, and it is a unique type of diaper that needs two plastic bags, and also the kid is twisting and wriggling and laughing with evil delight, and you’re attempting to complete the job before anybody notices, and also you undergo half a box of wipes and wrestle his pants and footwear back on, and also you have this big hurry-this pulsing thrill of victory-exactly the same way you may feel on the boat at ocean reeling inside a blue marlin.

Thomas Lake is really a freelance author in Decatur. His work has made an appearance in Sports Highlighted, the Wall Street Journal, and also the Washington Publish.

This short article initially made an appearance within our June 2015 issue.

 

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